


A x Lonely x Kurta

by HanaKaicho



Series: Leopika Week 2016 [4]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Crying, Emetophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Leopika Week 2016, M/M, Nightmares, the kurta massacre
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 18:23:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8220562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HanaKaicho/pseuds/HanaKaicho
Summary: This is a nightmare.He recognized it because he had had the same nightmare countless times. Even if it had been a while since the last time he had had this nightmare, he recognized it easily.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for this. Things have been cute and fluffy and now I'm beating y'all over the head with this. This was the only fic that I came up with on my own actually. I had to consult my friends and prompts online for inspiration for the others but because of my nightmare comfort fic fetish, this came to me right away lol (I'm sorry). The prompt for day four was Violet/Loss [ie. death, parting ways, grieving, etc]. Also, in addition to me loving nightmare fics, I also wanted Kurapika to finally feel safe enough to get a chance to cry it out. We've never seen him have that chance on screen really and he has plenty to get out.
> 
> Please bear with me. It's really harsh at the start but it gets better. I can't leave my children hurting with no comforts.
> 
> As always, please feel free to say hi on tumblr! I'm patch-of-shore!

This is a nightmare.

_He recognized it because he had had the same nightmare countless times. Even if it had been a while since the last time he had had this nightmare, he recognized it easily._

_Again and again he would see his brethren’s bloodied corpses strewn along the ground. Again and again he would hear the disembodied screams of those still alive as their eyes were plucked from their heads. Again and again he felt rage and powerlessness boiling him from within._

I know this is a nightmare.

_When he first started having the nightmare, he would run to the screams, try to save anyone he could but he never made it. He finally gave up trying to help when, as he burst into one of the houses he heard screaming from, he arrived only just in time to watch Pairo’s eyes taken from him and his small, fragile body dropped carelessly on the floor._

_Now he just stood at the entrance to his village. There was nothing he could do. He could only stand and watch and listen._

It's just a nightmare!

_Then something changed. There was a figure walking down the street towards Kurapika. It was small, probably a child, and it's arms were up and outstretched._

_“Kurapika.”_

Pairo…?

_“Kurapika, why did you leave? You left me behind.”_

No…I left to find someone to help you.

_As Pairo approached, his face came into view._

Wake up.

_Blood trickled down his cheeks from empty eye sockets._

_Kurapika wanted to run away,_ look _away but suddenly he couldn't move._

Wake up!

_Pairo’s hands gripped Kurapika's cheeks. As they did, Pairo’s face seemed to warp and contort into all manner of unnatural shapes. Kurapika's name came repeatedly from Pairo, echoed and distorted before finally,_

_“You left me alone. But now I guess you're all alone too.”_

Wake up!!

***

Kurapika finally succeeded in rousing himself from the nightmare and he jolted up in bed with a great cry. His heart was pounding. His head was spinning. His stomach gave a great lurch and Kurapika barely managed to fling the bathroom door open in time to vomit into the toilet.

His stomach emptied but the heaving didn't stop. His stomach continued to try to force out something that wasn't there, only letting up long enough for Kurapika to cough violently a few times before causing him to retch again.

“Kurapika!”

Leorio's voice reached his ears. It was urgent but not panicked.

“Hey, I'm coming in, alright?”

This wasn't the first time Kurapika had woken up approximately like this but the first time he had, Leorio had just burst into the bathroom and Kurapika had ripped the curtain rod off the wall and nearly taken Leorio's head off with it before either of them had any idea what was going on. Now, whenever this happened, Leorio was careful to announce what he was about to do before he did it, making sure Kurapika wasn't surprised by anything he did. When he woke up like this, Kurapika's nerves were already raw and he was extremely on edge.

“Okay, I'm gonna kneel down next to you and put my hands on your shoulders. Is that okay?” Leorio asked.

Kurapika managed to nod before his stomach clenched again and he nearly hit his head on the seat cover.

“Hey, hey,” Leorio chanted at Kurapika's side, his voice low and soothing. He gave Kurapika's shoulders a couple of firm, grounding squeezes.

When Kurapika's dry heaves finally subsided, he slouched into Leorio, spent.

“Okay, there we go,” Leorio said as Kurapika's breath gradually began to slow. “Do you want something to drink? Water?”

Kurapika nodded again. Leorio grabbed the towel from the rack and positioned it as a cushion as he propped Kurapika up against the wall and the tub.

On his way back with a glass of water for Kurapika, Leorio grabbed a couple of washcloths to help wipe the sweat from Kurapika's body. He ran them under cool water from the sink and crouched next to Kurapika who was staring vacantly into space.

Leorio gently dabbed and wiped Kurapika's face, clearing away sweat and other things. Switching to the next towel, Leorio wiped down Kurapika's neck, shoulders, and upper chest and back.

“Kurapika?” Leorio called. “Are you with me, buddy? Are you ready to drink some water?”

Kurapika's expression remained blank but his eyes focused on Leorio when he offered the water.

Leorio put down the cloth and brought the glass to Kurapika to drink.

“It's okay. You're going to be fine,” Leorio soothed

“It's not okay.”

“Huh?”

“It's not okay. It never will be,” Kurapika said, voice low and heavy. “My family, my best friend, my entire clan, they're gone. Murdered, tortured. And I wasn't even there to suffer with them.”

Tears gathered in Kurapika's eyes and spilled over.

“They're all gone. I'm the only one left. I'm completely alone. I should have died with the rest of them. Nothing I do will ever be enough.”

Kurapika started to curl in on himself.

_Alone. I'm alone. All alone. I'm all alone._

The words echoed in Kurapika's mind drowning out other thoughts. He had already been a freak but now that his people were dead, he was the last one. All the more freakish by virtue of being the only one of his kind.

He was vaguely aware of the fact that he had started repeating his thoughts out loud when he noticed Leorio’s hand on his shoulder again. Leorio pulled Kurapika into his chest and held him firmly.

“I'm here,” Leorio said. “It's okay. You're safe. Don't hold it in. You don't need to be brave for me.”

In the security of Leorio's grip, Kurapika came undone. Tears poured from his eyes and hiccuping sobs stole his breath. Leorio brought in his other arm to hug Kurapika to himself and he laid his cheek on top of Kurapika’s head. It was hard to watch Kurapika unravel like this but Leorio knew how much the man he loved needed this and he let Kurapika cry as long as he needed to, rubbing his back intermittently.

Kurapika's hands reached around behind Leorio and gripped his shirt like it was the only hold Kurapika had left.

After a while the sobs subsided into sniffles and Leorio was able to get Kurapika to drink some more water.

“Do you want to talk about the nightmare?” Leorio asked, crouching near Kurapika again.

Kurapika shook his head. “Why are you still dressed? Were you still awake?” he asked.

“I'm still finishing up homework. I'm trying to get ahead so I have time to study for the exams next week.”

“Oh, I see.”

Leorio stood and Kurapika also moved like he was attempting to get up off the floor.

“...I don't think I have the strength to walk right now,” Kurapika said after a bit of struggling, sounding tired in more ways than one.

Leorio chuckled. “Walk? You don't even look like you can _stand_ right now.”

Kurapika looked sourly up at Leorio and said, “Just be quiet and help me up.”

Instead, Leorio scooped Kurapika up in his arms.

“Leorio!” Kurapika cried, exasperated.

“Have you always been this small? Are you eating a healthy, balanced diet?” Leorio teased.

“You should feel really lucky that I'm so exhausted right now,” Kurapika said darkly.

“Okay, okay!” Leorio said with a laugh. “Want me to take you back to your bed?”

“No. I'm not ready to go back to sleep yet. Mind if I keep you company while you finish your homework?”

“Like I'd say no to an excuse to put my boyfriend in my bed.”

“Do you remember back when you were too embarrassed to say that kind of thing? I miss those days.”

Leorio made an indignant noise but took Kurapika to his room and set him down on the bed. Kurapika got comfortable on Leorio's bed with some effort and Leorio went back to working at his desk.

Kurapika smiled as he smelled Leorio's scent on the pillow and blankets. The deep purple color of the soft sheets and pillow case was soothing on its own but the scent made Kurapika feel safe and at ease by making him feeling so close to this person he loved and trusted.

“What's your homework about?” Kurapika asked dreamily, clearly sleepier than he was admitting.

“I'm working on an assignment about different forms of anesthesia and when they're used,” Leorio said.

“Tell me about it,” came very softly from Kurapika.

Leorio started explaining the subject matter to Kurapika in a low, even voice. He knew Kurapika was falling asleep anyway but figured he might as well lend a hand to the sleepy Kurta.

When Leorio heard a sigh heave from his bed, he turned to look at Kurapika who had, as expected, fallen asleep. He looked so sweet and peaceful like this. Leorio decided that homework could wait a few hours and he turned off the lamp on his desk and settled into bed next to Kurapika, pulling him close.

“Sleep well, Kurapika. I won't leave you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you guys for reading! I hope you at least found some comfort with the sleepy pika and the leopika snuggles at the end. Tomorrow is going to be cute again, I promise!
> 
> You can now also support me on Ko-fi if you really liked it! [Support me on Ko-fi](https://ko-fi.com/A3542089)


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